Offence is one of the responses we might feel when someone says something we find insulting. But like all negative experiences, we do have a choice as to how we respond. Jesus suggested we “turn the other cheek.” But what did he actually mean by that?
Do not allow bitterness
“You have heard that it was said, ‘An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.’ But I tell you not to resist an evil person. But whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also. If anyone wants to sue you and take away your tunic, let him have your cloak also.” (Matthew 5:38-40)
While the world would advise to get even when we’ve been wronged, that’s not what Jesus says. No, rather than to get even, we are to offer more of ourselves. Sacrifice. Surrender. Give way. Why? Because to give way prevents a hardness of the heart, a bitterness, and an unwillingness to forgive.
Human Rights
Our society is full of hostility. Let’s look ourselves from the perspective of our human rights. While this is important to regard when there are deeply disturbing abuses against innocents, it has become a plethora of self indulgence and self righteousness that swipes at others for the sake of money or justice in our own eyes. It has caused division and strife beyond measure in the UK, and in other Western nations too, I suspect.
Forgiveness is key to the Gospel message
Anyone who has been a follower of Jesus for very long will know already that central to the message of Jesus was to forgive. In fact, becoming born again is essentially repenting for our own weaknesses and asking GOD to forgive us.
As we have drifted in society from our Judeo-Christian roots, so too have we drifted from the concept of forgiveness; the media is full of testimony of tragedy and those who have been harmed say, “I can never forgive…” This is a curse upon oneself, far more than upon the perpetrator of injustice.
Northern Ireland history
In the sectarian violence of modern history, there were those killed on both sides of the divide, often innocent relatives of politicians or police or terrorists who were caught in the middle of the strife between those who wanted a united Ireland v those who wanted to remain within the United Kingdom. There were many instances of hatred and also many of forgiveness. In the end, a peace has been restored within the state, and forgiveness held a huge key in that process.
Do not take offence but go to your brother…
Whatever the cause of pain, we must not take offence. It is counter to the words of Jesus, it is counter to the teaching of forgiveness, and it is counter to the concept of unity. (It doesn’t actually help the person who feels offended either.)
So instead,
“Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.” (Matthew 5:23-24)
This, I believe, applies whether you are the offender or the offended. You can be the “big grown-up” and be the instigator of peace.
Flesh v Spirit
Whatever you need to lay down, youb can give it to the LORD. IF you find it difficult to let go of any resentment, allow the LORD to heal the grief and disappointment first. Then commit your way unto Him and He will direct your path to fully release the other party. You will discover you can walk in liberty, peace and freedom, knowing life without bitterness and full of His grace.