Reflections and Poetry

The Mathematics of GOD: a reflection

The Mathematics of GOD

GOD: The Mathematician. Where does it say that in scripture? Well, I could stretch a point and refer to the talents: 5 talents brought 5 more, 2 brought 2 more, 1 didn’t multiply by anything to bring more. 

LORD GOD is the god of addition and multiplication. He likes to grow us, to add to our character and multiply our blessings. That is the mathematics of GOD.

GOD’s sovereign perspective

But seriously, I’m talking about how GOD adds up the costs and benefits to our life, looks at the long term, and makes sovereign decisions about nations and individuals. 

We in Western society are in a crisis. Economies are in a global mess; most countries are in huge debt, and certainly in the UK there seems to be low growth and rising interest rates. Human beings are trying to fix the problem but the problem only seems to deepen (witness UK politics and the current state of its government). GOD is adding up the costs and benefits to bailing us out of our own poor choices and hypocrisies, and seems to be saying, “Nope, it’s better if you fail — better to your life — so that you end the hypocrisy, stop the greed, and learn to live reliant upon Me. If only the leaders would recognise the message and act accordingly!

Shocking reality: Death brings Life

Recently I have experienced just how personally GOD’s mathematics has added up in my life. I am actively praying with positive effect as part of more than one intercessory prayer group; I can see GOD is moving in the society and in my sphere of influence. Praise Yehovah!!

As I experience the joy of fellowship in ministry and the praise that is within me for answered prayer, I realise my growth and my industry would not have surfaced without tragedy in my life. 

My husband died eighteen months ago. But in that departure to heaven, I was led to move forward in ways I would not have as a married woman, not because my husband would have resisted it but because I would not had to find the courage to express “my” prayers. I have been pushed to be self-reliant — directly reliant upon GOD’s leading and prompting.

My husband’s passing is a human loss, but it is a heavenly gain and an earthly release. As a member of the Cloud of Witnesses (Hebrews 12:1) my husband is doing as he is called to do in heaven. I am doing the work the LORD has specifically designed for me to do on the earth at this moment in time.

The LORD was pleased with Alan. And Alan was satisfied in this life. He did his assignment on earth. With his passing, now I am released to focus upon the work the LORD has for me to do and I have the courage to do it.

Philippians 3:12-14 is one of my favourite scriptures

“Not that I have already attained, or am already perfected; but I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me. Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead,I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.”

We must not look back as Lot’s wife did, mourning our losses and regretting the past. Rather, after a period of grief and reflection, we must choose to trust in the sovereignty of GOD and in His perfect mathematics, if we are to complete His plans and purposes, living our lives as He intends for us. In other words, as tough as it may seem to be, loss is also release to live new chapters of our lives, so that we can move forward in ways we most certainly would not otherwise be able to do. GOD gives and He takes away, but mostly he releases us so that our gifts, our purposes, our lives will bring forth multiplication: some thirty, some sixty, some one hundred fold. (Matthew 13:8)

GOD’s leadership

GOD wants His kingdom to be on earth as it is in heaven. He has crafted us to be a part of that kingdom. We must look ahead in our lives, trust GOD’s craft and creation is perfect, and allow Him to perfect us. 

I am a single person again, not by my choice but by the LORD’s hand. This is not because GOD didn’t have the authority, power or will to keep my husband on earth, but so that we would both continue to work for GOD’s kingdom in GOD’s way. 

One day all of us will be with the LORD as we trust and believe in His son, Yeshua Jesus. But in the meantime, when our surrender, our promise to follow Him is sincere, we take what is given to us, trust Him and run with it. Alan didn’t die by accident; GOD didn’t take His eye of the ball and lose the man to his mortality. No. GOD looked at us, did His sums, and decided in His mathematics: Alan in heaven and Sarah on earth would yield the most and best fruit. 

When we look at any loss or tragedy in this light, His light shines into our lives and brings joy, peace and perfect sums.

Hallelujah, GOD reigns!

Reflections and Poetry

How to live: As though “Tomorrow is another day” vs “It’s now or never”

During December 2016 I had a prompt from deep within me: “Focus in 2017 because if you don’t do it now you won’t do it ever.”

So, what drives me is this sense of urgency to do all I’ve been called to do, now. To give all to God:

  1. following His lead obediently and passionately, as I surrender to the New Man within me, who is free from angst, self-will, frustration and impatience (which otherwise so often leads me into a state of emotional distraction that prevents me from living the joyful life Father has for me).2.
  2. publishing the documents – books and blogs – which have been on the shelf or in my heart and need to see the light of day, so that others can gain from the insights our Creator has given to me.
  3. supporting my family as wife and mother, so that my husband and son can be all they have been created to be, and express their love for Father in their unique and special ways.

I think storms lie ahead. In fact, we are in the storm even now, perhaps even in the eye of the storm.

Matthew 24 describes the latter days, the End Times before Jesus will return in glory, to judge the earth and to receive his Bride, also known as the Church of Believers….

So many of the earthquakes, rumours of wars, persecutions…. are in full swing already.

How do I cope? I focus on His call, and the responsibilities He’s given me to fulfil, now.

As I dig into God, I will overcome the trials and see His purposes fulfilled in my life.

Hebrews 6:19 reads, “This hope we have as an anchor of the soul, both sure and steadfast, and which enters the Presence behind the veil.”

And there’s an old song based on this scripture:

First of five verses:

Will your anchor hold in the storms of life,

When the clouds unfold their wings of strife?

When the strong tides lift and the cables strain,

Will your anchor drift, or firm remain?


We have an anchor that keeps the soul

Steadfast and sure while the billows roll,

Fastened to the Rock which cannot move,

Grounded firm and deep in the Saviour’s love.

I feel as though I’m on a stream train. At the start of 2017 it left the station, and I’m riding, not driving but nevertheless moving forward, gaining momentum. I’m moving from Calling into Ministry, gaining clarity, gaining speed, gaining momentum.

The fulfilment of God’s promises are imminent. He is intentional, and I join Him, carrying this sense that what I do now is imperative to His purposes.

This is the End of the Age.

Jesus will return.

There is already an almighty battle in the heavens which is manifesting on the earth.

Is the Battle of Armageddon imminent? Who knows when such things will come to pass?

My Call has been and is to inspire, encourage, equip, and empower Believers. Like Peter, who ministered to the Jews and who was convicted of His call to righteousness, my first call is to reach to those already following Jesus, and to compel them to complete their course, to fulfil their Call.

Never have I felt so compelled to be ordered, focused, alert, ready… never have I felt the promises of God so close to fulfilment. And so I choose to live as though “It’s now or never” because I think it is! And I encourage each of you to do the same.

Will your anchor hold in the storms of life,

When the clouds unfold their wings of strife?

When the strong tides lift and the cables strain,

Will your anchor drift, or firm remain?

We have an anchor that keeps the soul

Steadfast and sure while the billows roll,

Fastened to the Rock which cannot move,

Grounded firm and deep in the Saviour’s love.

Reflections and Poetry

TOTAL SURRENDER into the NEW: an A-B-C reflection

I’m Finishing What I Started:

As we move into November, we are nearing the end of the calendar year. I for one am not stopping long to take stock, because I’m moving toward the finish line and, like-it-or-not, time is running past to accomplish all that I’m called to do this year.

I have found building Larus Press a challenge, sometimes beyond me. I have persevered because the LORD has told me to write. And I love it. But I have also found my weaknesses have been exposed and have flourished: I am scatty, lacking in focus and controlling, and that blocks productivity, growth and creativity.

But though I may sound anxious, I am anxious for nothing (Philippians 4:6)

The new Logo sets the stage for change; oh, it’s still me and it’s still the gull, because nothing quite fits me like a gull: scavenger, survivor, free to fly with the will and the way to do it, not

necessarily beautifully or gracefully, or silently, but steadfastly. That’s me in the flesh.

In the Spirit, I’m a dove: gentle and thoughtful, committed and loyal, free yet bound to serve.

Either way, I have a clear view.

And the work of Our God: Yaweh, Adonai, Yehovah within me guarantees transformation in me and I hope through me to you, too.

As I approach this new chapter, still in the old year, I’m seeking to:

Avoid mental overload, starting each day full of His direction

Be open, full of freshness to the One who inspires me

Committed to focusing on the one task I have at a time, because Jesus kept others waiting until God gave him the time to move; letting go of control!

Don’t stall or procrastinate: this is a tough one, but is am eager to follow, and obey

Each day I will hope to fulfil my commission for that day

Forgetting what lies behind, I reach for what is ahead (Philippians 3:13)

My Challenge:

As I work in a quiet and focused way, methodically and patiently like never before, I avoid distraction and the mental overload that too many opportunities causes. Yes, there is too much to learn, too much to do “to keep on top”, and so I won’t. Instead, I throw all that “rushing” away (each day, if necessary) to keep a clear mind and an open spirit to how the LORD GOD chooses – or does not choose – to use me. For me, patience is as key as letting go of control.

This seems like a New Year’s Resolution. Well, it isn’t, though it has only just past the new year in the Hebrew Calendar….No, this is personal revelation in action.

To myself and to all of us, shall I remind:

Let us Stay within our Revelation. Our God, in His grace and mercy, has given us gifts to use, hands to create, minds to contemplate His wonder, His love, His creation and His commission.

So, let us Be subject unto God: James 4:7 says, “Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you.”

And as we surrender, we experience true freedom. As we let go of control, though the road may be scary or difficult, we remember like Job, “But He knows the way that I take; When He has tested me, I shall come forth as gold.” (Job 23:10)

Amen and Amen.