Reflections and Poetry

Testimony: Why I still believe

Television appearance

Recently, I appeared on Revelation TV to talk about the protection and blessings which have come following the tragic passing of my dear husband, Bible teacher Alan Tun. Though we had prayed for his recovery to full health, and although instead, Alan died, we know that “all things work together for good to those who love GOD, to those who are called according to His purpose.” (Romans:28)

For those who would like to see the programme, see R Mornings (February 24th, 2022), second hour of the programme, here.

Why I still believe

Although I lost my husband to illness even though many, many including myself were praying and believing for his full recovery, I still believe in the wonder and miracle-working GOD and Saviour Jesus. I still believe the Holy Spirit leads and guides those of us who seek Him. I still believe.

Why? There are physical miracles over the years, some of which I’ve been witness to. But there are character miracles too. I experience it in my own life, day after day, where He has altered my responses, renewed my mind to purer, more gracious ways of thinking, and touched my heart. I still believe because of who He is and who He leads me to be.

After some thirty-five years of following Jesus, I have become a kinder, gentler, more patient, and wiser person. Would this have happened as I aged naturally? No. I am sure that without the word and spirit of GOD actively in my life, I would not be the person I am. 

Each of us knows our own hearts. Mine once was full of fear, anxiety, desperation, self-absorption. This is no longer the case. Instead, my heart is aspirating towards grace, peace and love. I achieve it in some measure… all due to the teaching and grace of GOD. 

My surrender originally came out of hope and desperation; then from a passion for truth; now it comes from knowing through experience and commitment that GOD truly knows best. And so, for His love and His grace, I give my all to Him.

There is a story of a man, Horatio Spafford, who lost his children, lost his fortune. Still he wrote that well-sung lyric, “It is well, it is well with my soul.” You can listen to it here

No one avoids tragedy in life. It comes to all. But when we look at our own miracles, we overcome tragedy, knowing that GOD is faithful, GOD is sovereign, and He allows all things for our good. Loss of life, for those who know Jesus, is only loss of physical life as we know it. And for those who remain alive on the earth, we will grow more in GOD’s likeness even through the sadness, as we draw close to Him.


I have personal miracles in my life to give me the ability to trust GOD. I have a son who would not be on earth if it had not been for GOD prompting my husband and I to have a child when we had not planned on it. That young man is a wonderful testament to GOD’s will being done.

I have travelled across much of the world, and have had several adventures, simply because I allowed GOD to lead.

I have a resilience even in loss, even in widowhood, that I know GOD has given me and my son, through the prayers of many brothers and sisters in Christ, some of whom I have never even met personally.

Life is not ease

Walking faithfully with GOD, we are not promised a life of ease. But we are promised peace and hope. GOD has delivered both to me, time and again, in abundance!

When I experience trials, how I endure

The most doubtful moment I ever experienced was following a hurtful occasion in church, some years ago, when I was passed over. I had a gift I knew GOD wanted me to use. There was an appropriate occasion. But I was not given the invitation to use that gift. I was hurt. I sat in church on that day and said, “What is all this about, this Christianity?”

Immediately, an answer spoke to my spirit: Jesus is the son of GOD. Jesus was born of a virgin, Jesus died and rose again, Jesus will return, Jesus is true. 

Jesus is the heart of the Gospel, not we ourselves, not our answered prayers.

Physical proof of GOD

There are many instances when I have prayed or have watched others pray, and have seen physical miracles. I once prayed for a man in the street who needed new spectacles. I prayed that GOD would take away his need for glasses; instantly, He did! Hallelujah!

I’ve seen others pray for people with back issues, and have seen legs grow and people healed.

But above all, above all the physical miracles I’ve witnessed, I know I am a better human being for following Jesus’ wisdom and Jesus’ walk. I guess you could say, who I am now is a miracle.

Be blessed in your walk. Amen.