Reflections and Poetry

ICU: the second phase of Covid p1

As we parted with love and prayers, I wondered if the staff thought Alan might have to be put on a ventilator, and that was why they invited us to come… a sort of “just in case” we’d never see him again.

The Life is in the Blood:

The lady consultant

Monday morning 18th of January, the same consultant who had rung at 10:30 pm the night before rang to say Alan was much better and did we want to come to see him? He was now in ICU on C-pap, which meant his breathing had declined further, but we would be able to see him and pray with him. 

Thankfully Jordan was at home for school because of the lockdown. We were happy to be invited to see Alan after all the time he’d been in hospital (nearly 3 weeks) and hastily got ourselves together and went to visit. There was no time to contact Izzie but we’d share with Alan’s daughter later about finally having the opportunity to visit her father in hospital.

It took nearly half an hour to find parking in the hospital car park!

The first visit

When I met the consultant Dr I, she looked stressed, but she said Alan, after his collapse of the night before, was much much better. She smiled. She must have worked all night.

I think it is fair to say that these doctors are invested in the restoration of their patients. Yes, doctors are limited in what they can achieve with medicine, but they do what they can with all the passion and desire for success imaginable. What I saw in Dr I’s face was concern, relief and hope for us.

Alan looked weary but nodded and spoke to us as best he could, through the heavy mask. 

Looking back now, I wonder how I didn’t know the decline would continue. I think he knew… expected he might have to be put on the ventilator, but no one, not Alan nor any medical staff said anything to me. I did whisper to him at one point that, “You don’t have to accept the ventilator if they ask you.” He nodded to acknowledge he’d heard me.

We were with him for a glorious 45 minutes. The time flew by and we chatted about Elvis music, school and other trivial things. The nurse shared about her family and how she spent 2 days per week in ICU. Alan gave one instruction to Jordan, “Stand up straight.” It would be the last instruction Alan would ever give to our son; I didn’t know that at the time so how is it I remember it so clearly?

As we parted with love and prayers, I wondered if the staff thought Alan might have to be put on a ventilator, and that was why they invited us to come… a sort of “just in case” we’d never see him again. Yes, the thought crossed my mind, and yet I was confident we would return to normal one day.

6 replies on “ICU: the second phase of Covid p1”

Thank you Sarah! What precious last words Alan gave to Jordan!
I watched Bible Study on Revelation TV the other night, which obviously was a pre-recording. I could tell that Alan was not feeling well that evening, but at the same time he gave a wonderful contribution to the show!

Dear Sarah, I was just reading this verse & you came to mind so thought I’d share it with you. Blessings x

“What joy for those whose strength comes from the Lord,
who have set their minds on a pilgrimage to Jerusalem.
When they walk through the Valley of Weeping, it will become a place if refreshing springs. The autumn rains will clothe it with blessings.
They will continue to grow stronger, and each of them will appear before God in Jerusalem” Psalm 84 v5-7

Thank you so much, Jacqui. There are times when I feel far from strong. Bless you for this word of encouragement. We know in Him we live, move and have our being!

Sarah, thank you for allowing us to share in your own journey of loss and grief as you reflect on the weeks when Alan was ill, in hospital till the Lord took him home.Appreciate your honesty and attempts to try to understand or take in all that had happened before Alan died
I pray you will continue to know God’s presence, comfort, strength , peace, hope and deep love for you and for Jordan
Praise and thank God that both of you had managed to see Alan and had sometime with him
Shalom and take carex

Bless you, Poo Choo. I am writing to share so that others who are puzzled may learn events and find peace. Sharing, I find, is a good way to grow together in the likeness of Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith. Thank you for your thoughtfulness in writing. Every blessing to you.

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