Laban gives Rebekah a choice
Here we are in the Middle East, thousands of years before Jesus reveals his respect and love for women, and a brother gives his sister a choice in matrimony. Extraordinary! Here’s how it unfolds
Preparing the Bride for GOD’s Story
How do we prepare as the Bride of Christ? One aspect is to learn GOD’S STORY. He created us in His image…. Piece by piece, and peace by peace, we learn to walk as He has walked. And we learn His perspective.
Abraham’s servant explains to Laban his errand
Genesis 24:32-61
“Then the man came to the house. And he unloaded the camels, and provided straw and feed for the camels, and water to wash his feet and the feet of the men who were with him. Food was set before him to eat, but he said, “I will not eat until I have told about my errand.”
“And he said, “Speak on.”
“So he said, “I am Abraham’s servant. The Lord has blessed my master greatly, and he has become great; and He has given him flocks and herds, silver and gold, male and female servants, and camels and donkeys. And Sarah my master’s wife bore a son to my master when she was old; and to him he has given all that he has. Now my master made me swear, saying, ‘You shall not take a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites, in whose land I dwell; but you shall go to my father’s house and to my family, and take a wife for my son.’ And I said to my master, ‘Perhaps the woman will not follow me.’ But he said to me, ‘The Lord, before whom I walk, will send His angel with you and prosper your way; and you shall take a wife for my son from my family and from my father’s house. You will be clear from this oath when you arrive among my family; for if they will not give her to you, then you will be released from my oath.’
“And this day I came to the well and said, ‘O Lord God of my master Abraham, if You will now prosper the way in which I go, behold, I stand by the well of water; and it shall come to pass that when the virgin comes out to draw water, and I say to her, “Please give me a little water from your pitcher to drink,” and she says to me, “Drink, and I will draw for your camels also,”—let her be the woman whom the Lord has appointed for my master’s son.’
“But before I had finished speaking in my heart, there was Rebekah, coming out with her pitcher on her shoulder; and she went down to the well and drew water. And I said to her, ‘Please let me drink.’ And she made haste and let her pitcher down from her shoulder, and said, ‘Drink, and I will give your camels a drink also.’ So I drank, and she gave the camels a drink also. Then I asked her, and said, ‘Whose daughter are you?’ And she said, ‘The daughter of Bethuel, Nahor’s son, whom Milcah bore to him.’ So I put the nose ring on her nose and the bracelets on her wrists. And I bowed my head and worshiped the Lord, and blessed the Lord God of my master Abraham, who had led me in the way of truth to take the daughter of my master’s brother for his son. Now if you will deal kindly and truly with my master, tell me. And if not, tell me, that I may turn to the right hand or to the left.”
“Then Laban and Bethuel answered and said, “The thing comes from the Lord; we cannot speak to you either bad or good. Here is Rebekah before you; take her and go, and let her be your master’s son’s wife, as the Lord has spoken.”
“And it came to pass, when Abraham’s servant heard their words, that he worshiped the Lord, bowing himself to the earth. Then the servant brought out jewellery of silver, jewellery of gold, and clothing, and gave them to Rebekah. He also gave precious things to her brother and to her mother.
“And he and the men who were with him ate and drank and stayed all night. Then they arose in the morning, and he said, “Send me away to my master.”
“But her brother and her mother said, “Let the young woman stay with us a few days, at least ten; after that she may go.”
“And he said to them, “Do not hinder me, since the Lord has prospered my way; send me away so that I may go to my master.”
“So they said, “We will call the young woman and ask her personally.” Then they called Rebekah and said to her, “Will you go with this man?”
“And she said, “I will go.”
“So they sent away Rebekah their sister and her nurse, and Abraham’s servant and his men. And they blessed Rebekah and said to her:
“Our sister, may you become
The mother of thousands of ten thousands;
And may your descendants possess
The gates of those who hate them.”
“Then Rebekah and her maids arose, and they rode on the camels and followed the man. So the servant took Rebekah and departed.”
Laban’s motives: Abraham’s wealth
As the servant described the background to his arrival, Laban and his father must have been doing some accounting. Abraham would have been known, his wealth would have been known, and the servant merely was corroborating this. How much was Abraham’s wealth a part of Laban’s — and his father’s — willingness to listen? How much was hospitality? How much was curiosity, and how much an interest in Rebekah’s future?
Laban’s motives: An act of faith
The first words out of Laban’s mouth is “the thing comes from the Lord” And so, he speedily agrees that the servant should take his sister.
But wait…
Laban’s motives: Stalling
Abraham’s servant is relieved and celebratory. He lavishes gifts upon Rebekah and her brother and mother as well. (Why nothing for her father? Why is her father so passive in this entire scene? — Perhaps he is infirm, or has simply handed over all responsibility to his son by this stage?)
The family receives the gifts and treats the servant and his servants to food and drink and a night’s sleep.
But in the morning when it’s time to go, Laban stalls… Let my sister remain — 10 days perhaps? He doesn’t want to let her go. Why not?
Laban’s motives: A brother’s love
When the servant says ‘let me go now, don’t hold me back…’ Laban gives reveals all in one gesture: He asks is sister: what does she want? “Will you go with this man?”
In offering a choice to his sister, he saves face with the servant who has given a dowry. But he reveals something much more: he respects his sister’s choice. He has all the power in the family, and yet he subjugates this to her.
Extraordinary.
And surprising. Fast forward to Laban’s trickery over Jacob, who marries first Leah, when he wants Rachel. Laban’s behaviour here sheds new light on his view of women, a refreshing sort of light. He must have loved his sister, and he must have loved his daughters.
Let’s never judge. Let’s look deeply into the motivation of ourselves and others, to recognise GOD is in all our relationships, whenever we let Him in.
Blessings, Sarah