Decision-making: Flying solo – a reflection

The hardest part about losing one’s spouse, after the initial tragedy has been overcome, is the decision-making alone.

Alan and I made decisions together. In fact, we often saw a different perspective and didn’t agree…. but we discussed and worked out the way forward. Alone, there is no one to work out the choices, no one to debate or discuss with, no one to check my perspective; I am alone.

I caught myself feeling sorry for myself yesterday. It’s a no-go area…. Life ebbs and flows. We all face difficult circumstances. Some experience persecution, some loss, some irritating inconvenience. But each of us must rise above the circumstances, “walk on water”, trust — and lean upon — GOD and know He is our advisor, our shelter, our love and our friend.

Proverbs 3:5-6 says, “Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways, acknowledge Him and He will make straight your paths.”

Peace comes from knowing and trusting Father GOD. It does not come from our circumstances. Loneliness can be overcome far more easily when we trust Him. So, I seek His advice, perspective, through prayer, reading the word, asking friends for insight (and then weighing it), and through resting in Him. 

I have many decisions and choices to make along life’s way. I miss Alan being in that process. But GOD didn’t allow this situation to abandon me. He allowed it so that I might draw more closely upon Him. And I am. Hallelujah!

4 comments

  1. What a marvellous insight, Sarah. It must be hard for you but ‘God has made a way where there seems to be no way’ in helping you to make decisions and in other matters.

  2. Thank you Sarah for allowing us to continue to share your journey as you cope with the loss of Alan. It is understandbly difficult, and an adjustment for you now when you have to face situations and make decisions on various matters on your own .But great you are learning to seek and trust God for wisdom. Also, to depend on Him knowing He is always faithful which I can also testify to in my own walk with Him
    Appreciate your honesty .

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